Post by Rumpke on Sept 16, 2023 19:14:26 GMT -5
*The scene opens up just outside of Arena Liquors located in downtown St. Louis, Missouri. It's about 7pm central time, the sun has just recently went below the the horizon and the air has a slight chill to it. The loud roar of a vehicle is heard and the camera pans to the entrance of the parking lot. A large blue mid 90's model Ford F-350 with dark tinted windows is seen pulling up to the building. The driver shuts off the engine seconds before the passenger side door opens.*
*The camera moves around the front of the truck looking inside to reveal Rumpke as the driver and Shrimp being the passenger who's body has now freshly exited the vehicle. With the door still open, Shrimp asks.*
~Shrimp~ What do you want if they don't have Kentucky Cornshine?
*The camera quickly focuses on Rumpke. We can see his mouth moving but we're unable to hear what he's saying. As a result of this, the camera moves closer to the opened passenger door.*
~Shrimp~ Jim Beam?
*The camera observes Rumpke nodding his head in recognition of Shrimp's question. Shrimp nods at Rumpke before shutting the door. The feisty little turd acknowledges the camera with a cocky smirk appearing on his face a split second before he winks at the camera. Shortly after passing the camera by, the scene cuts to a commercial.*
*The scene fades back in to see Shrimp walking up to the counter with two fifths: one fifth of Jim Beam and another of Crown Royal. He places both fifths of liquor onto the counter. A "woman" with short dingy blue hair stops filming an unknown session on her phone long enough to ask Shrimp.*
"Woman": Did you find everything okay?
*Shrimp responds with a question*
Shrimp: I was looking for Kentucky Cornshine but couldn't find it. Do you have any in the back Ma'am?
*The "woman's" face turns beet-red suggesting a build-up of pressure in her body. Not even a second later, "she" goes irate.*
"Woman": Did you just assume my gender!?! How in the hell could you!?! You're an insensitive asshole! What in the hell makes you think I'm a woman!?!
*The crazed "woman" begins grabbing and slinging "one-shotter" bottles at Shrimp while continuing to shout obscene slurs at Shrimp. Then, she starts reaching for the glass pint bottles behind the counter and proceeds in slinging them at him while yelling, "Why!?!" at him. In cowardly fashion, Shrimps lets out a shriek before he takes off running for the door. Right before the little turd reaches the door, he stops, and turns around before dunking just in-time to dodge one of the two fifths he brought up to the counter. After that larger bottle sailed directly to the upper-right side of his head, Shrimp frantically yells...*
~Shrimp~ "Tits! It's your huge knockers, geesh!
*There goes the second fifth of liquor he brought up to the counter and this time; it skimmed the left-side of his face. Shrimp's eyes instantly widen at the realization of how close that bottle came. He shrieks, "AHHH!!!", at a higher pitch before swiftly darting out the door. The camera tries to keep up with him but Shrimp was easily too fast for the cameraman. The camera reached the door just in-time to see Shrimp closing the passenger door of the Ford F-350 that he arrived in. Upon reaching this moment, the scene, it cuts to another brief commercial.*
*The scene opens back up inside the cab of Rumpke's Ford F-350. Rumpke looks at Shrimp with a drunkenly confused gazed before he asks.*
Rumpke: Where's the alcohol?
*While slightly breathing a bit heavily, Shrimp says.*
~Shrimp~ Let's get it somewhere else, there's a woke nutcase working in there. I don't feel like getting shot for getting her pronouns confused.
Rumpke: Huh?
~Shrimp~ This lady, she got pissed off because I assumed her gender; then started throwing shit at me so I ran out of the door before she decided to get the shotgun!
Rumpke: Well damn man, you gotta be careful when addressing that shit these days... But, screw it, I'll go in there and get the alcohol while being completely neutral on that topic.
*Rumpke opens the driver's side door and hops out of the truck. Just before he slings the truck door shut, we hear Shrimp boldly saying, "Uh Hu, good luck with that! She's a freakin' nutcase!" The scene briefly cuts to where we see Rumpke walking into the liquor store, being careful where he steps, trying to not step on many shards of glass from broken liquor bottles that lays scattered on the store floor.*
*As Rumpke staggers to the liquor section of the store, he briefly looks at the deeply depressed lady who's now recording a video where she's ranting and raving about the rude customer who had just came in and called her a, "Ma'am". The drunk, he holds back a sigh, one that would be, of pity; for this deeply disturbed woman before turning his attention to a much more important topic to him, the brand of whisky he's planning on consuming. Rumpke see's many good brands that he could pick out but still hasn't found his favorite so he keeps searching for it as he's ready to further indulge his less than desirable (to many) habit.*
*After covering the whole section, Rumpke can't find "Kentucky Cornshine" and it's then; that he decides to settle for a fifth of Jim Beam before also grabbing a fifth of Crown Royal. He begins walking towards the counter while turning his attention to the store clerk who's still going on and on about Shrimp and conservatives in general. Rumpke slightly snarls while his face reveals a little grimace in disgust while he walks up to the counter. Upon reaching his destination, Rumpke sets the bottles onto the counter. The seemingly distraught clerk sets her phone down and walks up to Rumpke. Before reaching down to grab the bottles, she looks him in the eyes and asks.
"Woman": Is there anything else I can get you?
Rumpke: A pack of Marlboro Lights in the box.
*She turns around and grabs a pack of of Marlboro Lights before scanning it shortly after. The woman then reaches down to grab the bottles of liquor so she can scan them too. The lady, she instantly realizes that Rumpke has brought her the same two bottles that Shrimp had previously tried to buy and it's this realization that causes her eyes to grow wide.*
"Woman": Are you with that little prick that....
*Rumpke forcefully cuts her off.*
Rumpke: Look; I'm just here to buy these items and then I'll leave. There's no reason for you to get offended by that. I give no shits about your gender or your desperate streams looking for attention. I just want to get this business finished, so I can move on. Okay?
*The woman slightly shrugs before revealing a slight nod. She rings up the items and the two exchange the proper cash for these goods. Once Rumpke has the bags of liquor and the smokes; he smiles at the lady before saying.*
Rumpke: If you're planning on voting in the upcoming elections, please; for heaven's sake, research who you're voting for. If you can't do this properly, then don't vote. It's idiots like you, I'm sure that's voted for Joe Biden and you're part of the blame for this current shit show we've got right now.
*The woman looks appalled by what Rumpke just said and she instinctively begins to fire back.*
"Woman": Donald Trump.....
*Rumpke instantly cuts her right off by saying.*
Rumpke: Was a heck of a lot better than Joe Biden. I know that Trump wasn't a clean President, he done some bad things too but Joe Biden has been far more destructive to every aspect of America. The thing is, Joe Biden has a 40 year history of being garbage and every voter who voted for him chose to listen to a narrative rather than doing their research. Look at the cost of living, the inflation, fuel prices and all of the unlimited spending that he has pushed since getting into office. All of that spending, it will hurt our economy even more and now the government has no limits until 2025! I could go on and on about this and politics but I'll just kindly ask you to research the history of who you're voting for before you sign your life into their hands because that's only a portion of what you're doing when you vote for someone. To make matters worse though, you're also signing the lives of millions of other people away when you vote so please make sure you know what you're voting for. Don't rely on the mainstream for any information, they're all in league with the government. They will spew the government's propaganda around every straight away and corner... Take care of yourself, and don't act like a woke nutcase. You're obviously a woman and I'd think you could be quite beautiful if you weren't trying to look like something else.. Don't let those sick individuals in the mainstream change you.
*Rumpke smiles at the woman who is both blushing and speechless at the moment. Before turning around to walk out of the door, he says.*
Rumpke: See you later, take care!
*With that being said, Rumpke walks up to the door of the establishment and as he opens the exit; the scene fades to black.*
You know what else is declining? Competition in SFT... It's very sad for me to see that most of the competitors are complacent to the point where the product they continually put out, resembles the work of a part-time jobber; one that is still learning. Take note that these individuals I'm speaking of, they're the supposed to be the stalwart veterans of this current age of SFT.
A stalwart individual has these traits: 1.) They are loyal to their organization. 2.) They are reliable to their organization. 3.) They also work hard for their organization.
Those are the traits that a person has to possess in order to be a stalwart individual; and most of the competitors left in SFT have 2 of the 3 qualities that are listed but none of them possess the 3rd trait. Everyone of these guys I'm talking about, come out, show up and that's all they do; period. They don't work hard to push each other, they're the type of individual you work with that simply clocks in and does very little the entire shift. They're the weak-links in the team but they do consistently show up and put out a little effort, yet you shouldn't ever expect or hope for anymore than the bare minimum from them.
This upcoming Titans, Shrimp and I have to take on two of the individuals that I used to consider to be the best of SFT's current generation: Emerson and Jack Jones. Emerson, it's hard to not like the guy and this whole year; since I got out of jail and was able to returned to SFT staff, I've consistently been hoping as well as cheering for this man. I kept hoping that he'd turn things around. He's had an awful year in singles competition with a 13% win rate...
That's not the Emerson I remember. He was a stalwart, hard working individual who had pushed his opponents during the last time I remember him becoming the World Champion of SFT. Now, he can't even motivate himself to atleast put on a decent showing... On top of that, it's not like there's that much competition here these days. The truth is that Emerson has simply fell off that much from where he used to be and I'd like to know why... What in the heck is wrong with you Emerson?
Look bub, I hate to be the one to push you under the water but I also feel like you need this. Once I'm done, I'll also pull you back up.
I've never been one to play nice with you when we go into the ring against each other and it's not because I don't like you. It's because I have always wanted to push you, to see you do better and after seeing you pathetically job for so long; I figured that it was time to bring you into the woodshed, this way Uncle Rumpke could not only sort you out but he could also sort out your partner, Jack Jones because he obviously needs it also...
Big mistakes, eh Jack? You of all people should know better than believing in that catchphrase; cupcake... You trying to take me on is like myself trying to take Redd on. These match-ups, they very rarely ever work out for you and I, for whatever reasons. I know my shortcomings intimately, do you know yours? Based on your pitiful promo, I'm guessing you've not figured this out. You're just in that mode where you show up for work and do bare minimum just so you're able to say that you're there helping. And in all honesty Jack, I'm sure all of these easy competitors appreciate your donations after all, they've got to start somewhere; right? Why not begin their ascension up the ladder against a "glorified jobber" like you?
Sadly, that's exactly what you've been for at least a year now Jack Jones. So please forgive me if I don't sweat your empty statement about Shrimp and I coming up against you like it's a big mistake. The fact that you're thinking you'll come down to the ring this next Titans to have a good showing is the "Worst of Mistakes" that you could ever make.
With all of that out of the way Jack and Emerson. While I can't consider either of you two as stalwart veterans of SFT at this time. Both of you have always been loyal and consistent. When considering those two traits as well as how long you two have kept going. I believe that both of you are easily SFT Hall of Famers. And I hope that both of you can get back on your feet again sometime soon to go on to becoming Stalwart Hall of Famers.
Best of luck to you guys at Titans 170!
