Post by Princess on May 1, 2019 3:40:02 GMT -5
--HARDCORE PRINCESS--
We open to a soundstage at the nightclub known as Omenes, owned by Laurel Anne Hardy. Princess in dressed in all pink. Her outfit is made from pink latex. Her mask covers most of her face, revealing only her thick lips and piecing blue eyes. Princess is standing in front of an SFT backdrop. In her hand is a pink microphone. The magical girl begins to speak.
"My friends, enemies, lovers, family members, fans, and obsessed stalkers...
I come before you as wrestling's first magical girl, ready to do battle on these ancient war paths (While wearing either pink latex or a nice tutu outfit, as is my style). These paths have been traveled by my grandfather, father, mother, uncles, cousins, and so many family friends that I lose track. I am the current attraction, the current trainee, the magical girl known as Princess. The blood of legends runs through my veins. My style is known worldwide as CUTE STYLE!
CUTE STYLE!"
Princess pauses to pull at the SFT backdrop. It falls to reveal a second backdrop that says CUTE STYLE in in pink, bold letters.
"You know my father, Nirvana. You know my mother, Rachel Pitt. Now meet their daughter, full of sugar and love. It is I, a true hero for a modern age. Princess, soon to be SFT Hardcore Champion. All it takes is one victory. Don't worry, I WILL Swan Kick every last wrestler Joseph Black puts before me in the jaw. I will! I promise!
I also promise that my smile will never leave my face. I will share my happiness and love to help make the locker room a much better place. But before I can do that, I must prove that I can fight. I must take my piece of the pie and leave astonished wrestlers in my wake, like my father before me. Perhaps I may even get a little bloody.
And for times that I must get bloody, I have my trusty sledgehammer, Pinky the Sledgehammer. She was a gift from my mother, you know. I have the feeling my future opponents will be getting to know Pinky very intimately when I swing for their heads. I'll make you orgasm from pain while I play the drums on your skull with a giant pink sledge hammer. If this is what I must do to take my first SFT championship, you better believe I'll play like the one armed guitarist from Def Leopard."
Princess pauses here to adjust her tights and stretch her legs. She flashes a cute little smile at he camera.
"Do you bleed rainbows, SFT?
What do you bleed?
I bleed love and kindness, and I have a smile that cannot be broken. But underneath it all, I am a woman who was trained by the hardest wrestlers SFT has ever seen. I am a woman who survived homelessness, nearly being raped, and having my home burned to the ground in 2014.
I'm a survivor and I'm here to take the SFT Hardcore Champion! I'm the bisexual badass! The Magical Mousey Girl! SFT's Cutest Daughter!
Call me the Hardcore Princess! Bloody I will become, as my mother before me! Lead I will, as my grandfather Shadow did in the days of myth! Look to me and you will see the magic of a bygone era when fantasy ruled these lands. You will believe that a 5'2 ballerina can don a mask, become a magical girl, and take Strike Fantasy Towers by storm!
Watch me take this world and make it magical!"
Princess begins to speak in her loudest voice while moon walking across the stage.
"MAGIC! WATCH WE DANCE! WATCH ME TWIRL! WATCH ME PIN MY OPPONENTS FOR THREE SECONDS AND WIN BELTS!
Don't watch my rise to greatness, watch my feet. These feet are going to win me more matches than anything else I have in my arsenal. Every kick has the force of a donkey's kick. I have enough strength in my legs to knock out a giant and enough cuteness to win over anyone who thinks they're a loner.
I'm of a special breed.
A special, magical breed."
Princess pauses to pull a bag of glitter from her tights. She throws glitter all over the place like a madwoman.
"When I arrive, I arrive to the sound of magical music. You will know me by the trail of glitter left behind.
And you will know my name is Princess when I take the SFT Hardcore Championship. Say it again, my friends. Hardcore Princess. Bloody but not beaten, I'm the only who bruises flesh and leave you more red than an apple. I'm the girl you're all going to learn to fear. Mousey and magical!
Watch me take the world and make it magical! Believe in your magical girl! In the end, you need only hold your lighters high as the beginning notes to Swan Lake begin to play and I make my arrival. I'm changing the world, only match at a time. I'm changing SFT, one word at a time. And maybe, just maybe, I can bring a little bit a magic to every fan in every arena SFT visits.
Now this promo must end but I will return soon with more words of wisdom. I promise you this. From Manchester, England, this has been Princess!"
Princess takes a superhero pose. The scene fades to black.
