The End

I listen to so much yet I hear so little. I see all around me yet I feel so blind. I have power within me, yet I feel weak each day. I’ve learnt so much, yet it would appear I know so little.

I am neither here nor there. I’m everywhere but yet I am nowhere.

Its early evening in England. The sun has been beating down all day long as it has for day after day now here in his homeland. But this evening is special in the context of the last few months, because finally at long last it has decided to rain.

And it’s in the rain under a small bridge where we find him sitting. We can see that’s he’s been walking in the rain as it currently runs down his face. He’s wearing plain jeans and an old Immortal Outlawz t-shirt. We’ve seen him here before not too long ago, strange that he would return to this place. Right now many would expect the mighty Glenn Owen to present himself in a more mysterious land, one of fantasy maybe? But no, here he sits as plain as the evening sun. Maybe he’s not so powerful and mysterious after all?

You know something Jude, the strangest thing has just happened to me. For a long, long while now I have been planning this moment, far longer than you realise. It took an age to get you to face me, hell I even had to produce my own ppv to get you here. I knew so clearly what it was that I wanted to say. I thought that the moment I knew you were finally listening to me the words would just role off my tongue, and that finally, whatever message I wanted to portray would finally get though.

Yet Jude…. I have nothing…..

I assumed that the rage I felt for so long would so easily leave my lips and consume you, that words would flow and that I would become who I know I was once and who again I knew I could still be. It was going to be the return of Glenn Owen as you remember him, that force and entity that used to rule the world.

Yet Jude…… I have nothing…..

And that bothers me more than you know. For that is what I have become my friend, nothing…. I have no words left to say, no arguments left to make. There is no power to what I say and I have no force left to unleash. But in a sad way, I knew it was always going to come to this. I think I knew that deep down, when the time came that I would have nothing left to give.
I’m sorry my friend, I am not what I once was. And for that I give you my deepest apologies.

Glenn looks down at his shirt, it’s faded over the years but we can still make out what it says. It’s the shirt of his former stable The Immortal Outlawz, one of the more historic groups in the history of SFT. They would battle fearlessly with another group called the Dead Pac. Legion, Shadow and Co on one side and Glenn Owen, James Flame and Co on the other.

Here’s my problem Jude, and it’s a big problem, because as you watch me now, you are seeing what you have also become. We have nothing left really do we my friend? But here is the problem, you are fine with that, and I can’t help but thinking that given another choice you would keep it this way. SFT for you has become a nostalgic playground, one where you and those real life friends close to you get to dance to the same old tune. If you win, who cares? If you lose, who cares? If nobody watches, then who cares? If our shows are up on time, it doesn’t really matter does it? If someone goes the extra mile to create an all-purpose, powerful website, then does it really matter? After all who has time for colors and fonts? Black text on a page is all that you really need!

And Jude, I say that not to insult or put you down, but I say it because that’s the way it is! Sadly, that’s not the way I am. And I say this only now because I know that nobody is listening, and nobody really cares.

Glenn lights up a cigarette, he wishes his actions had more meaning, but sadly they do not. He’s just a guy lighting up and smoke and that is all.

I miss Shadow my friend, I learnt from his wisdom and I worshiped his words. But as much as I adored him, I never wanted to become him. I still like to think that if he’s up there right now on his laptop looking down at us, that he would be screaming at us both saying “For God Sake, don’t make my mistakes all over again”. Would he really want us playing around in a home long since lost? Sure, we can keep it alive, but in doing so we watch the world go by and miss all the other opportunities that life brings.

And that is something I simple cannot allow to happen Jude. I can’t be your prop any longer. I can no longer sit and dwell with you on times gone by for comfort and for fear of letting go, because what we had is gone. And no matter how hard I tried to make us what we once were…. You weren’t really with me were you Jude? Deep down, it’s not what you want.

And so your small little nostalgic playground SFT will always be. I was prepared to do so much, return us to what we should be. I did everything, and I mean everything I could! I kept my promise to Reno Destiny, a promise I knew I did not really have the time to make. I gave us all the platform to conquer the world again….. Yet when the time came nobody would stand with me. You preferred to hide in the shadows of the past! And there I was, left on a hill alone, just like I find myself alone right now.

SFT makes me feel alone! And as a family man who is loved dearly, I refuse to be alone any longer….

Glenn stands up and looks out from under the bridge. The rain is starting to fade a little now, it’s more like a light drizzle, so Glenn decides to step out and walk along the small path which leads him back to Southwick.

In many ways I hate you Jude, yet I love you at the same time. I’m not joking with what I say now, the words are just not there anymore. If this were the past I would walk away and take some time off to re-group, but sadly you keep me locked here carrying out duties I designed for us all to share, yet nobody else has the desire to fill,, and I hate that! That hate will just lead to anger and resentment, and that’s the last thing I want. For me and you and this grand old place we call home share a bond that will always last a lifetime. It’s eternal in nature and it’s something I hold dear. The lesson that you helped to create for me carry over from this life into the other, and it’s for those reasons that I’ve felt a sense of duty.

But sadly Jude, I fear I can no longer follow you down this path. And for that I am truly sorry my friend.

I hope that one day I really do find the words for you that you deserve, and can be that entity that once again lights up your soul. But for now, I have nothing. So tonight I walk home for what I’m sure will be the final battle. I tried by best old friend, I just hope it was worth it… and I hope SFT is now what you want it to be. For now I leave the future to you though, promise me you’ll make the most if it.

Good luck old friend.

Glenn puts out the cigarette and walks along the small path as the scene….

Fades To Darkness